"Masks"

This poem was written in 2004 because I felt that people were expecting me to be one thing and I really felt like another person.

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Here I sit
wanting, alone
All around me the
world spins
All around me the
people are laughing

On the outside
I am laughing
On the inside
I am crying

Who wants to be alone?
Who wants to have no one?

I am wearing a mask
The mask that hides
my true self.
From whom am I hiding?
I know not.

Myself or maybe you
I must hide or
face the interminable
interrogations of those around me

My life is like a
shadow dance
sound and fury
signifying nothing

Or is it?
What is my purpose?
Do I have a purpose?
Why am I here?

These questions and
more I ask myself.
I know nothing
and everything.

What is life for?
Must I hide
behind these
masks my whole life?

Here I sit
wanting, alone
All around me the
world spins
All around me the
people are laughing